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All Year: Yes
Area (ha): 7
Persons: 4
Category: Organic Farmstay
Host ID: 40972
Country: Ireland

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Last Updated: March 6, 2019

HELP! I've bought an Old Farmhouse by mistake, I need the good, the strong and the not so ugly to help me out. I sort of want to say it's organic, but I've had a brief peruse of other hosts and they're all talking about permaculture, which I thought was a bad hairstyle fashion, big in Liverpool in the eighties, along with shell-suits and rioting! I'm out in the sticks here people, well just a 15 minute drive from the famous Medieval city of Kilkenny, 'The Marble City' -self flagellation and thumb screws are optional- bravery is not, so just 15 minutes out of town and in the heart of the Kilkenny Mountains, on a rare night, like tonight, every single star in all the Galaxy, lights up the Irish sky, the crows snore, loudly and if your lucky and drink enough you might just see the leprechauns dance through the woods, that's a very rare night, it's mostly overcast and chucking down unreasonable sums of rain. Don't be alarmed during the day, which may also be damp, if you hear a tractor go by once in a while, or once a day, as the case is and you'll have cows upon cows, upon cows and even more cows upon cows for neighbours, so if you're inclined to be neighbourly, learning cow would be recommended.

There's a pub down the road, if you fancy a jar of the black stuff, but I wouldn't risk staggering distance. The natives seem friendly enough, but don't appear to speak English, a neighbouring farmer, whose convinced I'm his cousin, though I suspect they all think that about each other around here, said he'd lend me a lawn mower,at least I thought that's what he said; an occupy the orchard situation for a few precarious months with a single savage pony ensued, then there was the lad that showed up from Wexford with a girl from Bristol, and a horse trailer. There was wine and a hazy promise to return to collect them, whatever they are, they called her Daisy and I called him Napoleon, but frankly I don't rightly know what manner of creatures they seem to be, hairy and tusked and they eat like absolute pigs, I've been appeasing them with bread and belly rubs, but I don't know if I can hold the fort for much longer, before Napoleon try's to eat one of the Kittens or worse still .. me! if you arrive and there's just a pair of gum boots where I should be, my advise to you, is the advice I was given before purchase, 'run away, run away quickly and don't bother to shut the door behind you'! In short In lieu of a small army, I'm looking for some courageous and willing people, you'll need a good pair of wellies and a strong sense of humour, I'm currently farming beer cans and weeds and having returned from Ski-bumming in Colorado, let me tell you neither are the good kind and did I mention HELP, SOS, fire-fighter styley type help! Unless it happens to snow and you randomly brought your ski's, I can't teach you a single thing I'm afraid, but you can find any number of projects and learn with me along the way, fields need draining, gates, fences, barn doors & frames measured and made, there is at least half a mile of dry stone wall that needs repair, ditches & woods cleared, tree's pollarding, weeds and bracken brush cut -hang on whilst I sink a bottle of Whiskey at the prospect of it all.

The house -built in the 1700's still needs some minor snagging, but it's comfortable, chilled out, has speedy Wifi and with two open fireplaces, is warm, if your happy to scratch you head, roll your sleeves up and scratch your head again, if you'd like to be a significant part of creating and implementing a lovely new project, in which our combined imaginations will be the limit, then for goodness sakes come and visit, stay a while, all are welcome, all are accepted, we leave our judgements on the gate you're going to have to build and let the good times roll ... up hill, with moss ... probably and elbow grease definitely. :)

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